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I long for freedom, and when I get it, I don't know what I'm going to do with it, but I will surely be happy.

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Monday, February 28, 2011

It's time...I feel it slipping away from my hands,I can feel it bleeding out of me,of my wounds and my silent moments..and I'm tired of losing life to this tremendous nothing...I feel like these moments should have lived longer,I feel  like I'm losing them too...the details are escaping my head,the smells,sounds and scenes are fading away...and I am struggling to keep them inside but they keep rising to the sky...they are dying,and I can't bare it,and life is slipping away,and I'm all alone...and you won't understand
You just won't understand.

Worn from walking this far
So worn from talking this much
And what we found and what we've seen
As the road curves down

And the lights come up to meet us
Silent for the evening
We enter this town
Like new born creatures

Those I know I see anew
And the space between us is reduced
For I am human
And you are human too

So turn and turn again
We are calling in all the ships
Every traveler, please come home
And tell us all that you have seen
Break every lock to every door
Return every gun to every draw
So we can turn
And turn again

Only priests and clowns can save us now
Only a sign from God or a hurricane
Can bring about
The change we all want

And we've done it again
This trick we have
Of turning love to pain
And peace to war

We're just ash in a jar

So turn and turn again
We are calling in all the ships
Every traveler, please come home
And tell us all that you have seen
Break every lock to every door
Return every gun to every draw
So we can turn
Saturday, February 26, 2011

زارَ الرّئيسُ المؤتَمَـنْ
بعضَ ولاياتِ الوَطـنْ
وحينَ زارَ حَيَّنا
قالَ لنا :
هاتوا شكاواكـم بصِـدقٍ في العَلَـنْ
ولا تَخافـوا أَحَـداً..
فقَـدْ مضى ذاكَ الزّمَـنْ .
فقالَ صاحِـبي ( حَسَـنْ ) :
يا سيّـدي
أينَ الرّغيفُ والَلّبَـنْ ؟
وأينَ تأمينُ السّكَـنْ ؟
وأيـنَ توفيرُ المِهَـنْ ؟
وأينَ مَـنْ
يُوفّـرُ الدّواءَ للفقيرِ دونمـا ثَمَـنْ ؟
يا سـيّدي
لـمْ نَـرَ مِن ذلكَ شيئاً أبداً .
قالَ الرئيسُ في حَـزَنْ :
أحْـرَقَ ربّـي جَسَـدي
أَكُـلُّ هذا حاصِـلٌ في بَلَـدي ؟!
شُكراً على صِـدْقِكَ في تنبيهِنا يا وَلَـدي
سـوفَ ترى الخيرَ غَـداً .
وَبَعـْـدَ عـامٍ زارَنـا
ومَـرّةً ثانيَـةً قالَ لنا :
هاتـوا شكاواكُـمْ بِصـدْقٍ في العَلَـنْ
ولا تَخافـوا أحَـداً
فقـد مَضى ذاكَ الزّمَـنْ .
لم يَشتكِ النّاسُ !
فقُمتُ مُعْلِنـاً :
أينَ الرّغيفُ واللّبَـنْ ؟
وأينَ تأمينُ السّكَـنْ ؟
وأينَ توفيـرُ المِهَـنْ ؟
وأينَ مَـنْ
يوفِّـر الدّواءَ للفقيرِ دونمَا ثمَنْ ؟
مَعْـذِرَةً يا سيّـدي
.. وَأيـنَ صاحـبي ( حَسَـنْ ) ؟!

لــ أحمد مطر 

I've been watching Grey's Anatomy for like a month now and I'm really enjoying it,it really surprised me that it kept the same level of suspense,fun and deep thoughts,I've never watched a show till the third season but this one is just amazing.
In the fifth season,which is where I got so far, the story of Christina Yang and Owen Hunt begins,it is so beautiful that it makes me wanna fall in love! it's like nothing and everything at the same time,it's like how real love would be like...it reminds me of how love used to be stereotyped...you know,bent el jeeran at the balcony :D
Here is a soundtrack,this show has the most amazing soundtracks!

On what is going on there,read this article please.
This is really good stuff,sooo funny!

Friday, February 25, 2011
I bet it is easy for us to laugh at it while other people are suffering,but I have to admit that it's extremely funny,Al Qadafi is a funny guy...seriously!he's like the world's biggest joke now!

And this one I could not embed...this one is pricelesssssssss HERE
Wednesday, February 23, 2011

I bet you have guessed by now that I'm an awkward person..
I'm not very friendly or welcoming to those whom I don't know well,around my friends I'm the complete weirdo that I am,but around strangers I'm more like a tree...a talking tree-not that it talks a lot-,it is really hard for me to make friends,but when I do make them it is great.
When I'm alone all sorts of awkward things happen to me...awkward situations and embarrassing moments..I don't know why,I can't help it I'm an awkward person by nature
It's a gift (-_-')
So with the beginning of my last semester-this semester- all my friends suddenly changed their plans to graduate after the next summer course and they all left.
I sound pathetic when I say it,but I admit it..I'm all alone,and I've never felt so alone in my life...and I'm not even a people person! I love hanging out by myself,but this is too much...I'm really tired of sitting alone,this is supposed to be my last semester..my last days at JU and I'm sitting all day long wishing my classes would finish quickly so that I could get back home.
I hate it when some people that I know feel sorry for me ..and they actually say it out loud!...seriously they're like "Aw,you're so sad and alone,I feel bad for you!" I just hate it,so I don't like to even be seen anymore!
If I had known that my uni life as I know it would end at the middle of my third year I would have had more fun,skipped more classes,enjoyed every minute...
Now I wish I'd cut a class but I have no reason whatsoever to do it,I'm always reading in a book or watching people(with their friends)*pathetic*
And worse than all of that is the idea of graduating alone,getting my graduation picture alone,getting the graduating gown alone,standing in the graduation ceremonies alone....sometime I even think I don't wanna go to my graduation..
I sound so pathetic...I know I'm feeling sorry for myself and I'm not enjoying it,but I really can't help it..
I really miss having friends...I am sorry for every time I said friends are overrated or disposable...friends are important...very important,and I really need one right now...
I just want this semester to be over,I don't wanna enjoy uni and my last days in it anymore that idea expired long time ago in my head...I just wanna graduate and stop being alone..

PS Currently reading:

Good night :)

بَرقَتْ له مسنونةً تتلهَّبُ 
أمضى من القَدرِ المتاح وأغلبُ

حَزَّتْ فلا حدُّ الحديدِ مخضَّبٌ 

بدمٍ ولا نحرُ الذبيح مخضًّب

وجرى يصيحُ مصفّقاً حينا فلا 
بصرٌ يزوغُ ولا خطىً تتنكَّب
حتى غَلَتْ بي ريبة فسألتُهمْ 
خانَ السّلاحُ أم المنيَّةُ تكذب
قالوا حلاوةُ روحه رقصتْ به 
فأجبتهم ما كلَّ رقصٍ يُطرب
هيهاتَ دونكه قضى فإذا به 
صَعقٌ يشرّق تارة ويغرّب
وإذا به يزورُّ مختلف الخطى 
وزكّيةٌ موتورةٌ تتصبَّبُ
يعدو فيجذبه العياءُ فيرتمي 
ويكاد يظفر بالحياة فتهرب
متدفقٌ بدمائه متقلبٌ 
متعلّقٌ بدَمائِه متوث

ابراهيم طوقان
Monday, February 21, 2011

I just find it kind of silly to write about my insignificant life when all of this is going on with our brothers in Libya and Bahrain and other countries...

I'm just here to say how disgusted I am towards what is happening in Libya,Al-Qaddafi proved to be the new Hitler..at least Hitler was killing people because he believed in an idea....Al-Qaddafi is just taking joy in doing that only to keep his money and fake position...only to keep robbing his people and controlling them!

A Humanitarian catastrophe is happening now in Libya,people are murdered,wounded and tortured,women are raped,protesters disappearing and the country is being robbed and Siaf al islam whose only characteristic in all of this is his relation to Al-Qaddafi finds enough audacity to point his disgusting fingers at the people and threaten them!
But the people are still strong,and they will keep it up en sha Allah,and they will join Egypt and Tunisia in their victory.

Put them in your prayers people,and hope for a better Arab world,you never know!
Friday, February 18, 2011
Something to think about,I wanna talk about this later..

Lorca dice:"Yo soy español integral y me sería imposible vivir fuera de mis límites geográficos; pero odio al que es español por ser español nada más, yo soy hermano de todos y execro al hombre que se sacrifica por una idea nacionalista, abstracta, por el sólo hecho de que ama a su patria con una venda en los ojos. El chino bueno está más cerca de mí que el español malo. Canto a España y la siento hasta la médula, pero antes que esto soy hombre del mundo y hermano de todos. Desde luego no creo en la frontera política. "

Lorca says: "I am completely Spanish and I could never live outside my geographic boundaries, but I hate those who are Spanish for the sake of being Spanish nothing more, I am a brother to all and defy men who sacrifice themselves for an abstract national idea, for the mere fact that they love their country with a blindfold on. A good Chinese is closer to me than a bad Spanish. I sing for Spain and I feel it to the bone, but before that I am a man of the world and brother of all. I absolutely do not believe in political borders. "

يقول لوركا:0

"أنا اسباني كليّاً،و لا أستطيع العيش أبداً خارج حدودي الجغرافية،لكنني أكره هؤلاء الذين هم اسبانيون ليكونوا اسبانيين فقط،الجميع اخوتي،و أرفض الذين يضحّون من أجل فكرة قومية مجرّدة...فقط لأنهم يحبون وطنهم معصبي الأعين،الصينيّ الصالح أحبُّ إليَّ من الاسبانيّ الفاسد
أنشد من أجل اسبانيا و أشعر بها حتى النخاع..و لكنني قبل ذلك أشعر بالعالم بأكمله،و بأخوّتي للجميع. لا أؤمن بالحدود السياسية بأي حال من الأحوال."
Thursday, February 17, 2011

It's not that I don't have anything to say...I've a million things I wanna talk about,but somehow my empty day doesn't seem to fit for some blogging!
Anyway I just wanted to document this
Today I was looking for my friend in front of a restaurant,and a homeless guy suddenly stopped me and said LOUDLY:
من أيِّ كوكبٍ أنتِ؟
"What planet are you from?" in standard Arabic.
And then he walked away leaving me thinking "Good question!"

Have a great weekend,lesson of the day: it's OK to be alone sometimes,maybe it'll help you get to know yourself better.
Good night ;)
Monday, February 14, 2011
Sometimes fear is good,sometimes when you have fear it can push you over to where it's safe
A couple of days ago I told my friend that it might be good if he loses his job because then he'll be afraid and work harder to get better,and when I read this story I remembered that...
Also,Japanese people rock,read this

تبلغ مساحة اليابان حوالي سبعة عشرة بالمائة من مساحة المملكة العربية السعودية، ويبلغ عدد سكان اليابان حوالي مائة وثلاثين
مليون نسمة،
 بكثافة مقدارها ثلاثمائة وسبع وثلاثين نسمة في الكيلومتر المربع . وحوالي ثلاثة أرباع المساحة هي غابات جبلية
لا تصلح للزراعة، لذا يكثر السكان على الشواطئ ، ومن هنا كان السمك طعاماً رئيسياً في اليابان .
ولمعرفة مدى اهتمام اليابانيين بالسمك فقد أحصيت حوالي أربعين مجلة علمية ( معظمها باللغة اليابانية ” تنشر أبحاثاً عن السمك
والثروة السمكية . وتكاد لا تخلو جامعة في اليابان من كلية أو قسم لدراسة هذا الموضوع . بل هناك جامعة متخصصة
بالدراسات السمكية . إضافة إلى وجود عدة جهات تمول أبحاث هذه الثروة . ولا عجب في هذا فاليابانيون يصطادون
حوالي خمسة عشر بالمائة من الثروة السمكية في العالم ” في المرتبة الثانية بعد الصينيين ” .
وقد قرأت في موقع الجيش السنغافوري هذه القصة عن اليابانيين وحبهم للسمك الطازج فأحببت أن أنقلها لكم .
إنه منذ عقود لم يعد السمك يقترب من الشواطئ اليابانية . وقد حل اليابانيون هذه المشكلة فصاروا يصطادون في عرض البحر
والمحيط بعيداً عن السواحل . ومع الزمن كبرت قوارب الصيد وأصبحت تبتعد أكثر عن الشاطئ . لكن هذا يؤخر وصول
السمك إلى البر مما يعني أن السمك لن يكون طازجاً !
لحل هذه المشكلة صارت سفن الصيد تحمل معها الثلاجات والمجمِّدات التي يوضع فيها السمك فور اصطياده .
وهذا أدى إلى ازدياد حجم السفن وأصبحت تبتعد عن السواحل أكثر فأكثر، وبالتالي زاد زمن بقائها بعيداً عن الشاطئ .
فهل في هذا مشكلة؟
نعم !
السمك الآن لم يعد طازجاً !
لأنه موضوع في الثلاجات والمجمِّدات، أي صار الناس ينظرون إليه على أنه مجمَّد وليس طازجاً !
فانخفض سعر السمك الذي يتم صيده وتجميده بهذه الطريقة !
ما المشكلة في هذا؟
المشكلة واضحة فالسعر المنخفض يؤدي إلى عدم الرغبة في جلب المزيد من السمك إلى السوق ! فما الحل؟
اليابانيون دوماً عندهم حل !
فقد صاروا يحملون معهم في سفن الصيد أحواضاً كبيرة مملوءة بالماء، يضعون فيها السمك، فيبقى حياً إلى أن يصل
إلى الشاطئ فيخرجونه للبيع !
إنها فكرة ذكية ولا شك . لكن ما الذي حصل بعد ذلك؟
لقد اكتشفوا أن السمك يصل إلى الشاطئ وهو يشعر بالكسل والخمول !
لأن السمك يزدحم في الحوض فلا يتحرك كما كان يتحرك في البحر ! وبالتالي فإن طعمه يختلف عن طعم السمك الطازج !
ما لهؤلاء اليابانيين؟

إنهم لا يعجبهم العجب ولا الصيام في شهر رجب كما يقول العامة .
وكيف يستطيع الصيادون إرضاءهم؟
والحل دوماً موجود عند اليابانيين .
فقد وضعوا فرخاً صغيراً من سمك القرش في الحوض !
ولماذا ؟
حتى لا يتوقف السمك في الحوض عن الحركة هرباً من سمك القرش ! .
هل ما أصاب السمك من خمول وكسل في الحوض هو ما يصيبنا – نحن البشر – عندما لا نعيش أمام تحديات؟
وهل التحديات التي تواجهنا تجعلنا نشيطين في أعمالنا ؟
وهل التحديات تبقينا في نشاط دائم ؟
إن النجاح لا يتم في الحياة السهلة التي ليس فيها تحديات !
فلنستخدم كل ما وهبنا الله من مهارات وإمكانات ومصادر لنعمل شيئاً مختلفاً عما يعمله الكسالى والخاملون .
ليضع أحدنا فرخاً من سمك القرش خلفه …
ولينظر إلى أي مدى سيتقدم في هذه الحياة …
Sunday, February 13, 2011
I know I haven't been here..like really here,I miss reading your blogs everyone,but since I'm in the mood of not actually doing anything these days I really am...not doing anything 0_O
Hold these posts just a bit,I will be catching up,now smile and close this window ;)

My window+my ceiling:

That window could use some cleaning eh? :P
Friday, February 11, 2011

He didn't even have the courage to say it himself,but the important thing is that he left!
Mabrook Egypt,allah ye7meeky ya rab! :)
I know,I know...forwarded emails,I hate them too,but this one I loved!
Amazing reply by J.P. Morgan CEO to a Pretty girl
A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
     Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?     I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New  York . My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden ( ? ) , $250k annual income is not enough.          I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:     1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)     2) Which age group should I target?     3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys     4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)          Ms. Pretty               

Awesome reply:
     Dear Ms. Pretty,
     I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots
 of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you.. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
     Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange
 of 'beauty' and 'money': Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.
     By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a
 position, dating with you is also a 'trading position'. If the trade
 value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for
 long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great deprec iation value will be sold or 'leased'. Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you.
     Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in 'leasing'
 services, do contact me....
     J.P. Morgan :)

Thursday, February 10, 2011
الله يحميكِ يا مصر

Is there such thing as an academic crush?cause if there is I think I have it on my Arabic-English translation professor :DD
I had registered the class with someone else but I took it anyway cause it was the only one on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday and that suited my schedule,and she actually came and gave us a class on Tuesday,but when I walked in today I saw a guy and I thought I entered the wrong room,but turned out there was some switching between professors and we got him.
He is just SO smart!! and unlike 99% of other professors he is taking translation seriously! you can see that he loves it,and you can see that he is talented and hard working,and he has an amazingly charismatic character when it comes to teaching,he reminds me of another professor I had when I was a freshman :)
I just can't wait to prove myself in this class because I know it will be hard,and it is just what I needed,a hard translation class and a good professor!
I just wanna be a better translator and I need someone to yell at me to do it! :)
Special delivery to Sheeshany and Doomish!
As I said in a previous post I've been all "doomishy" for a while,staring constantly at my bedroom's ceiling,which is not any nice in particular, actually it is a very boring ceiling,it is white...just white! Maybe that's why I'm staring at it!

I'm thinking of getting me some of these stickers that light up in the darkness,and stick them on the ceiling..that way I can also stare at it when the lights are off :D
A moon and a couple of stars maybe,and clouds...that'll look cute :)
And since we're talking about bedrooms Mr. Doomish,my whole bedroom is white,but my sheets and carpet are light brown with dark brown stripes,and my curtains are gold,I have many many boxes because I have so many things that I don't need but can never throw away,this is what my room looked like when I first took it...it was so clean and tidy...let's just say things changed (-_-')
My shopping addiction created an over population crisis at many places in my room,my peg,my closet and my drawers are all stuffed...so to solve the problem I had to come up with some inventions that are not advised to be seen in public.
My balcony is deserted in winter,I'm afraid if I open the door a flood of mud will rush inside lol
That's it I guess,any questions?
Wednesday, February 9, 2011

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?
I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason

'Cause you can't jump the track; we're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe,
Oh breathe, just breathe

May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss
Just today, he sat down to the flask in his fist,
Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year.
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him; Maybe I'll just sing about it.

'Cause you can't jump the track; we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.
No one can find the rewind button, boys
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe, just breathe
Oh breathe, just breathe

There's a light at each end of this tunnel, you shout
'Cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
and These mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you only try turning around.

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer
inside of me, threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
'Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to

But you can't jump the track; we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, now
Sing it if you understand,
and breathe, just breathe
oh breathe, just breathe,
oh breathe, just breathe,
oh breathe, just breathe
Tuesday, February 8, 2011

So I'm not blogging like I used to,chocolate doesn't have any effect on my mental state anymore,I'm absolutely,intentionally and strongly not reading anything,I'm always in my room staring at the ceiling,I can't even stand Firuz in the morning!,my last semester at uni is rolling quickly and I should live and appreciate every day left for me in it,but I'm only anxious to go home and stare at the ceiling again!
What is that?I'm not depressed,I'm not lonely,I'm not thinking,I'm not falling in love,I'm not anything!so what the hell is wrong???????????????????0_O
Monday, February 7, 2011